Doris Bersing, PhD
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Latinas’ Challenges to Come Out of The Closet

Copyright : Bogdan Ionescu

Copyright : Bogdan Ionescu

In the Latin culture the role of women is sometimes defined narrowly and women are brought up to be “super” moms and dedicated wives. The family pressure to keep a clean home, raise well-mannered children and be fabulous cooks can be a little overwhelming. You can add onto that pressure that to be a good “wife” and “mother” implies being heterosexual, and find the right “husband” not the right wife.

Latinas,  are professionals, blue collar workers, students, artists, and they all face their own struggles, successes, and secrets.  For we Latinas are as diverse, as shallow, and as deep as our dominant-culture counterparts. Our stories of immigration and oppression are gripping, but they are not only stories of discrimination or acculturation to tell, we also have our gender struggle stories to tell. Some are wives and mothers, yet individuals, too and some of us are lesbians and proud of it. Yet our culture and family does not welcome, always, our “coming out of the closet”. Our stories are as wide and as varied as the hues we come in.

Even the Spanish language conspires against those women who called themselves lesbians or bi-sexuals, because most of the counterpart words in Spanish have a negative connotation. Activists at the Human Rights Campaign had written that “…Although “gay” has the same meaning in Spanish as in English, the word “lesbiana” still has negative connotations. Many Latina women who love women, however, are purposely using the word to reclaim it from those who would use it against them…” (Read More)

On another article HRC states “… Although Latina/o Americans come from various cultural backgrounds, many who come out as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender share similar experiences and challenges. Some, who were raised Roman Catholic, must reconcile themselves with the church’s teachings that acting on one’s homosexuality is sinful. Language differences often make finding resources and support difficult, and a lack of LGBT Latinas/os in media and entertainment perpetuates invisibility. Fortunately, however, anecdotal evidence suggests that a growing number of Latinas/os are coming out…”

Find more resources for Latinas y Latinos “coming out of the closet” on HRC: Guía de Recursos Para Salir Del Clóset

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Gay and Lesbian Couples Counseling

Copyright : Rudolph Pieterse

I am always looking for the latest, the newest article or event related to LGBT well-being or LGBT rights, just a passion of mine, and part of my practice. However, some things like the Iliad by Homer and the Bible are timeless. Not always the newer is the better. For instance, I ran into a wonderful article by by Michael C. LaSala, Ph.D., LCSW in Gay and Lesbian Well-Being for Psychology Today where he addresses the issues of  “Helping Same-Sex Couples Who’ve Lost That Loving Feeling”

Dr. LaSala stresses the importance  -in the midst of our fight for same sex marriage, he addresses how to avoid same sex divorce, and said “…What about couples’ therapy? If your relationship is having problems and you are pursuing this step, that’s a good sign–the prognosis for your partnership is good because people who take action to save (or improve) a troubled relationship often manage to do so. However, if you’re looking for someone to referee your conflicts, or to finally convince your thickheaded partner of your unassailable sense of fairness and the truth, you’ll be sorely disappointed. Over the past 25 years, I have done quite a bit of relationship therapy and here is some of what I have learned that you should keep in mind as you move forward…”

Sometimes, I think couples, LGBT or others just wait too long to seek therapy and sometimes it is too late when they come to see me for help. Perhaps this article will help you to do the right thing in a timely manner (wink-wink). Read Dr. LaSala article


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